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The World Is Waiting To Hear Your Story Thu, 14 May 2020 19:08:45 +0000 en-CA hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.9.4 https://pattimhall.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/10/cropped-icon-1-32x32.png fear| Patti M Hall https://pattimhall.com/fear/ 32 32 Are you willing to be wrong about writing? https://pattimhall.com/willing-wrong-writing/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=willing-wrong-writing Mon, 20 Mar 2017 16:04:28 +0000 http://pattimhall.com/?p=1220 Are you willing to be wrong about writing? Good! I’m here to tell you—YOU’RE WRONG. (and give you some TIPS to prove it to yourself) Writing is one of those creative, expressive tasks that provokes a lot of emotions. Wherever you are, whatever you’re feeling about writing, I’ve got you. Whatever you are telling yourself…

The post Are you willing to be wrong about writing? appeared first on Patti M Hall.

]]> Are you willing to be wrong about writing? Good!

I’m here to tell you—YOU’RE WRONG.

(and give you some TIPS to prove it to yourself)

Writing is one of those creative, expressive tasks that provokes a lot of emotions.

Wherever you are, whatever you’re feeling about writing, I’ve got you. Whatever you are telling yourself about writing, I’ve said it, and say it still, and I know that most of the time, I’m wrong.

Are these scenarios familiar?

Scenario: You saying that writing is too hard for you. Well, you’re wrong.

Scenario: You try to convince yourself that your story isn’t important enough to write down. You’re wrong, again.

Scenario: You try to sell yourself on the idea that you shouldn’t write about your life, because it might offend or bother someone else. Oh my, you’re really wrong on that one.

My friend, if you’re yapping at yourself, verbally flailing around saying “I can’t”, then I ask you,  are you willing to find out you’re wrong? 

I’m here to tell you – That’s not you talking, Honey. That’s our shitty, nasty, self-serving friend Fear. Fear uses shouldn’t, mustn’t, can’t and better not, like no other limiting belief does.

How about you and I tell Fear to get back into its box in the trunk and ride this trip out from there?!!

Brace yourself for it …

The more serious coaching message

is coming now…

The time rolls around when you need to lose the excuses and put not just your perfectly manicured toe in the water, but your whole damn body. Put the force of your whole person behind the pen and PUSH it down the page.

Try this: Write a paragraph about how you are sad, pissed off or heartbroken.

Oh, you know you can write that. (Betcha can’t stop at a paragraph.)

Or, try this: Write a few lines about feeling angry and how what happened was a much longer story than what he said it was. Write the full details, just to feel better that the truth has been put into the air, that you told your version.

One feeling, one story, one point to be made.

That’s how life writing begins. Way to go. Now just do it again.

One feeling. One story. One point you want to make.

I know that once the pen lifts off the page, Fear lifts the lid on the trunk and you aren’t sure you’ll ever be able to show anyone this, or that you can ever turn this into a book. Please, savour the feeling of putting you on the page for your own peace of mind, healing or sense of closure. Savour now.

Let’s worry about the other stuff later, okay? At the risk of a little repetition, here’s more of me talking about Fear, in an interview I did with Lara Heacock at KindOverMatter.com last year:

You won’t sense you are extraordinary until you put yourself out there, until you put some part of your story out there, if only on the page in your personal notebook, locked away in a desk. I always say, you’re extraordinary the second you open your mouth and tell your story because you realize that it is incredibly interesting and meaningful to other people. Your perception is extraordinary, even if what you’ve lived doesn’t seem to be. We just might be wrong, when we make pronouncements about our stories, because we are speaking out of fear.
What has been a reality kicker for me as a writer is that I still so often misperceive my own experience. My inner critic says, what’s the big deal about what happened to you, it’s no different than it’s been for anyone else. It sure as hell hasn’t been common, but if it was, great.
I have to remind myself to tell the story anyway, because I’m likely wrong. It is enough to tell the story because you have it to share. We have neither a full nor fair perspective on our lives. That’s why coaches, editors and other readers are so critical to our writing life stories. Sometimes, we are the worst and most harsh judges of ourselves. We get a lot of things wrong because of fear.
How do we counteract the limits that fear is placing on our writing? Ask yourself this: What do I want from my story?
Have you got some part of you that needs to get out? Have you got something that you really feel like you need to say? Most people will say, “I kind of think if I talked about this, it might help other people.” Almost inevitably, some part of our willingness to talk is purely charitable, storytelling is sharing, it is giving. It starts there, but the hard work that keeps you going is the feeling good about writing it. You’ve got to put some ink on the page for no other reason than to see what it feels like.

If you’re willing to be wrong … and I know you really, really wanna be, then write an opening paragraph for the book you have always wanted to write, and share it with someone you love and trust.

Admit it. It feels good, doesn’t it? 

 

The post Are you willing to be wrong about writing? appeared first on Patti M Hall.

]]> 12 Reasons You Should Write Your Memoir Anyway https://pattimhall.com/12-reasons-write-memoir-anyway/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=12-reasons-write-memoir-anyway Wed, 15 Jun 2016 15:47:08 +0000 http://pattimhall.com/?p=883 It’s time, right?  You’re ready to write about your life. You bought the gorgeous notebook, the beautiful pen, the tea is made, your butt is in the chair and then the really hard part begins… Telling the voices of criticism, doubt and skepticism to pipe down (especially the ones coming from inside your own head.)…

The post 12 Reasons You Should Write Your Memoir Anyway appeared first on Patti M Hall.

]]>

It’s time, right? 
You’re ready to write about your life.
You bought the gorgeous notebook, the beautiful pen, the tea is made, your butt is in the chair and then the really hard part begins…

Telling the voices of criticism, doubt and skepticism to pipe down
(especially the ones coming from inside your own head.)

Do any of these sound familiar to you?

You’re not a writer!
Who’s going to read your story?
A memoir? You aren’t famous?
You can’t write that stuff!
What if no one ever reads it?
What if someone does read it?

Here’s my first piece of memoir coachly advice:

Give the same response to every comment, from every person.
Some of clients and writer pals use this one:
I’m writing my memoir anyway.

Make it your mantra.
But when you need to, dive into these twelve reasons (and a bonus one!), every time the noise in your head challenges you for an answer to one of these questions.

2016-01-31-1454277931-6131706-womanwritingphoto.jpg

Why write about your life?

12. To find you: You won’t know how brilliant you are until you see yourself on paper where you’re honest, not judging yourself and no one is watching.
Write to hear your voice.

11. To find the next step on your path: To consider where to go next, it helps to understand how your past choices got you to today.
Write where you’ve been.

10. Because there is value in remembering: You write, and you remember. Writing pulls from places we don’t visit in our daily lives.
Write to remember.

9. Because you’re bound to learn something: Writing about your life gets you to wondering why something happened, or how you got this way.
Write to dig deeper.

8. To feel better: Your story may have some pain in it. On the page the fear is gone, the sting relieved.
Write to get through the tough parts.

7. Because you have a lot to be grateful for: You’re fortunate—in your country, living in this time, being loved.
Write to tap into your gratitude.

6. To pass on some enlightenment: You’ve learned a lot in your experiences, travels, and relationships. You’re a warehouse of wisdom.
Write to share your message.

5. To show the rest of you: There is more to you than parent, worker, sibling and friend. You have opinions, feel passionately, and live with your heart.
Write to show your full self.

4. To share the strength and the failures: If you decide to let someone read your writing, (and you don’t have to) you just might spare your reader having to learn the hard way.
Write to share your story.

3. To get your side of things on the record: There is always someone who tells a version of the truth that simply isn’t how you remember it.
Write to tell it your way.

2. To leave a piece of yourself behind: Our writing lives on, is savored and treasured by others and has a depth of connection our loved ones crave.
Write to leave a piece of yourself for someone.

1. Because you can. We are the only species that can communicate this way. Studies prove that the physical experience of pulling our stories, finding our words, and sifting through our memories releases the bliss chemicals.

That’s the bonus: 

Write because it feels so good.

And remember this response for all the naysayers…
“I’m writing my memoir, anyway.” 

originally published in Huffington Post

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]]> What Every Memoir Writer Must Eventually Decide https://pattimhall.com/every-memoir-writer-must-eventually-decide-huffingtonpost-com/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=every-memoir-writer-must-eventually-decide-huffingtonpost-com Wed, 11 May 2016 18:13:45 +0000 http://pattimhall.com/?p=855 “One of the unique features of humanity is our desire to be part of a community of storytellers and listeners. I have a simple explanation for why I can conclude this with confidence—if stories were not so important in our interaction with each other, why would we spend so much time talking? Our stories compiled,…

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]]> “One of the unique features of humanity is our desire to be part of a community of storytellers and listeners. I have a simple explanation for why I can conclude this with confidence—if stories were not so important in our interaction with each other, why would we spend so much time talking?

Our stories compiled, threaded and intertwined compose memoir, the genre of the century, someone braver than I has said.

Memoir is a privilege.

Memoir writing is a service to self.”

This post originally appeared on Huffington Post.

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